The Inevitable Return of the Great White Dope

You have to be some kind of cute to get away with this bullshit.

I matched with Ghost on Tinder again, kind of at random. His pic wouldn’t load, all I really saw was the age (23) the brief bio, and his name; shot in the dark if it was him or some other soldier. Then he texts me… oh, hello hello. So he IS back in town! I do a little happy dance. He apologizes for going ghost on me after our hookup last time he was up here, and I accept it. Truth be told, I don’t care what the circumstances are that lead to it, all I care about is getting some more of that quality dick from him. He’s just built to give women orgasms. I still enjoy him on a personal level as well, regardless of his mild douche-baggery. I can forgive a lot for a cheap thrill from the right person, especially if they make me laugh. I tell him about the blog and he’s digging it, he seems happy with how my life has developed since he was here last. I mean, he was my first hookup from an app; he gets to take partial credit for his part in inspiring this journey I’m on. He and Clark Kent were the first two men I was with after my husband, when the whole divorce started. They did me right.

So we make plans to see each other Friday night. So stoked, I cannot wait to take this boy for a ride again and show him how different I am now that I’ve got more confidence. He ends up cancelling on me Friday night, but we plan for Saturday instead- and the big talk starts. He tells me he’s gonna show me his head game since I’m not on my period this time, and to make up for the fact he didn’t bring a uniform or his dog tags. Done, son- this is the kind of talk I’m all in for. Promises me up and down he’s going to bring the noise and I’ll have trouble walking when he’s done with me. I’d like to make that wager, sir. Saturday comes and goes, no word from Ghost… he’s doing the thing again. He’s blowing me off, didn’t respond to my text asking when to pick him up. Sonofabitch I could murder this boy for getting me all worked up with no happy ending. My time is precious, jerk. I accept my fate and tell him it’s cool for whatever reason he’s ghosting me again, I’m not going to get all crazy on him. I wish him all the best during his leave in Alaska visiting family. Over and out, on to the next!

Fast forward a few days I get some really exciting news regarding my future with the blog, and I shared it with my partners of interest. I went back and forth about telling Ghost, but part of me really wanted him to know that this thing might be taking off. If nothing else he should be aware I’ll be telling these stories in a more public format very shortly. He responds! Hooray! Gotcha, bitch. He apologizes ONCE AGAIN for leaving me high and dry with no contact, and I guilt him about it. Really and truly, a courtesy text politely declining or canceling our plans is all it takes, I take rejection like a champ. I digress. I tell him I want to hear his voice again, so I want him to call me. He’s got that slight lisp that just drives me WILD…. I need to hear it. He obliges and we make plans to see each other that night. I get excited, then he calls back to cancel. MOTHER FUCKER I WILL EAT YOUR GOD DAMN SOUL. He tells me tomorrow, tomorrow he’s going to make it all up to me that he was a d-bag. He wants another entry on the blog, in more detail than the one I slapped together a month after the fact. I don’t see that being an issue, he fucks like a champ and I absolutely love his body type. Big boy, big dick, big personality. I’ll take it.

The next day rolls around and I’m getting that sinking feeling he’s going to blow me off, but low and behold he texted me around noon! It’s happening. He gets back at me when the time is right and I head to go pick him up; I am positively vibrating with excitement to see him again. I can’t remember much on my own about our night, but what I wrote about him still gets me hot. Sometimes, okay more than sometimes, I re-read the stories I post just to masturbate to them. His is one of those. I scoop him up and take him home, on the way there I mention I want to take a quick 5 minute shower because I’m kind of particular about bathing before getting down. He says he needs one too- hooray, co-showering is my favorite. The way to my house he’s putting his hand up my skirt and my hand on his hard manhood. He’s DTF right meow. We get back to my place and I do my 1-2-naked magic trick; I go from fully clothed to nude in like no time flat. He’s probably still taking his boots off by the time I’m in the shower. When he joins me he tells me it’s impressive how quickly I get down to business- boy, you have no idea. We make out a little in the shower between me fussing with my hair and getting all scrubbed up. I get to wash him and I really enjoyed it, I just love, love, love his body. Then he starts biting on me just the way I like, and I flash back to the night we spent together 2 months ago. Fuck yes, I am ready for this re-cap.

Once dried off we hit the bed running. Immediately I get on top and we make out a bit, I ask him “so about that head game?” He flips me over and pulls me close to him. Remembering how big he is in the dick department we remove my Nuva Ring at this point because it’s just going to hinder things. He eats me like it’s going out of fucking style. An aggressive tongue lashing to my lady parts, I get off fast and hard. He’s grown his hair out a bit since our last encounter and I’m pulling any of it I can get my fingers to latch on to. He gets on top and as soon as he’s inside me it’s all over. I have missed this dick. He’s got length, girth, AND a giant head. It’s more than moderately uncomfortable depending on the position. Like when I was on top, I couldn’t handle it. I had to lean forward and have him pound me, instead of my normal swivel. I just couldn’t take it all or find a way to accommodate it while being in control. I am literally screaming with every orgasm, climbing up onto his body like a koala bear, clutching to his sweaty man flesh and clawing at his back. I really like how this man lays it down. I’m cumming frequently and I even squirted… so slippery, thankfully he’s gigantic so it made things better and I didn’t lose out on any sensation from friction loss. We go a few rounds, each one progressively more aggressive than the last, he seems to like it. I love his big hands on me, pinning my arms, choking me, picking me up and moving me around the way he wants me. Yes, yes, yes. All the things.

Because of his gift to me with his mouth, I return in kind. I start out with my 2 handed HJ and he seems to be enjoying it, a fairly quiet partner it’s hard to gauge if he’s all that impressed with it. But when my mouth gets involved I can watch him squirm, and hear his breathing changing. Oh yeah, that’s doing the trick. Everybody is good at something, am I right? I go down for a while and he’s getting into it, he reminds me I offered to give him a crash course in prostate stimulation and I happily oblige. He appeared to like it, but I don’t think it was his cup of tea. No worries. We take a break. This is my other favorite thing to do with him: hang out naked and talk. He’s just a down-ass dude. I could listen to that lisp tell me stories about crazy things all day and night. We scroll through my phone to show him the hot men hitting me up for hotline bling, he’s impressed. I like that he can appreciate them for their looks too, like he’s not afraid to say “that’s a good looking man.” God damn right they’re good looking. I survive entirely on attention and sex at this point in my life. Maybe alcohol…. and carbs. He’s digging it, my lifestyle is fun and interesting. He fully supports All The Dicks and my path to acquire them all like Pokemon. This is what I love about a man like this; sex-positive to the max. He’s promiscuous, I’m promiscuous, and together we fucked like animals just enjoying the good time.

We go one more round and it’s phenomenal. I ask him if he likes fucking me, he says yes. I demand he tell me he loves fucking me. He follows orders like a good soldier. SAY IT AGAIN. He obliges. SAY IT AGAIN! He obliges again, and I cum. He’s just doing it right, I could get brutally railed like this every day for the rest of my life. Despite all the sex we had, he doesn’t get off. Remembering last time, it took all night and then a morning round for him to orgasm. I tell him if he’s got time while he’s in town, I’ll gladly go again and try to get him to climax. He says yes (but history dictates he’ll probably flake, which is not a concern at this point- I got what I came for.) We chatted briefly about bringing another girl into the mix, and he confesses he’s never had a 3some. Surprise surprise, he’s perfect for one. He goes and goes and goes with no finish, and he’s hung like a circus pony. Plus, he’s also adorable and super fun to talk to. I’m going to see about lining up a lady friend to join us while he’s in town. As I’m driving him home to his family’s house he laughs that not to make light of the situation with my divorce and all, but it appears my life has only gotten better since the dick-bag cheated on me and I left. It’s so thrilling to hear another man gloat how impressive my man-harem has gotten, and all the wonderful sex I’m having doing this “strangers with benefits” thing. I’m going to bed this boy again before he leaves, and hopefully gift his more than ample appendage to a yet-to-be-determined friend. Happy holidays, tis the season of giving.

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DD Fnord

I left my cheating spouse September of 2015. In October of that year, I filed for divorce and set out to move on and reclaim my lost libido. I spent 8 years of my 20's faithful to two unfaithful men, I have so much time to make up for! All The Dicks is my journey having sex with whoever I want, whenever I want, however I want. The first person I spent the night with after my husband, reignited the spark and desire I thought I would need counseling to retrieve. The second person I was with sealed the deal. I wasn't broken, I just needed a tune up. This collection of encounters are the ones worth re-telling- I don't write about every sexual encounter I have, and I certainly don't bother with any that were sub-par. The screenshots are my own personal wall of shame, but also my trophies because nobody puts baby in a corner.

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