Mr. Articulate, and the Homie Hookup

I get chatted up by what can only be described as a beautiful specimen of a man. He’s incredibly tall, handsome, and looks like he takes good care of himself. I love his strong jaw. We keep it short online other than to express interest in each other, and we begin texting. I’m into it, he’s into it. He wants to see me soon, I’d definitely like to climb this mountain. He tells me he’s all about taking care of his partner- yes please. We exchange some pics… I love his body. I love his face. This man is beautiful. He seems somewhat reserved, but sweet. I appreciate he didn’t send me an unsolicited dick pic, or text me in graphic detail all the explicit things he’s into. Not that I’m into mystery, but I enjoy a partner who doesn’t go straight into “I’m going to fuck your pussy raw and cum on your tits- if you’re into that.” I dunno, call me old fashioned but I just don’t really enjoy that. I played along with texting in that manner when I first began this journey, because I figured it’s just part of the culture, but now I refrain. I’m in this for me, remember? Doing it my way.

He comes over and the moment I see him it’s all over for me. Do you have any idea how much taller 6’4” looks to a 5’1” person? He was impossibly tall. His voice is deep but not Lurch from Addams Family deep- I like it. Very masculine. I questioned how the dynamics of our hookup would work out, but I’m definitely interested in figuring it out. For starters, he goes down for days. I lost track of time, space, reality… you name it. He just kept going and going- and it was incredible. You can tell he doesn’t just talk a big game about pleasing his partner, he lives it. He wants me to get mine over and over and over. The sex itself is really good, he’s well endowed and does whatever I ask to get me mine. I don’t normally go down on my hookups, but I very much enjoyed his face time so I reciprocated. I know I’m very good at it. His enthusiasm regarding my skill is what drives me to do it to completion- another rarity. I LOVE how much he talks and moans while he’s orgasming, and while he’s experiencing pleasure in general. This is the kind of vocal partner I prefer in every way because even if the sex hadn’t been great, I would have at least felt pretty good about my participation in it.

He gets off the first time and we take a break. The afterglow is amazing; he’s kind of quiet and looks contemplative. I’m rushing with endorphins and chatterboxy. He makes a reference to a movie I’ve never seen where after the main characters have sex he man falls into the post-coital coma and the woman is just turned up to 11. He laughs at how accurate that scene is for this moment right now. I can’t help it, when sex is good you just want more. I excitedly ask him if he can get it up again- he chuckles, yeah probably. The more he speaks the more interested I become in him as a person; he’s incredibly articulate, has a large vocabulary, and he presents himself as a thoughtful and well read person. I ask him what he does for a living because I couldn’t for the life of me remember if we’d talked about it, he tells me he’s a server…. and also a writer, working on a book. DING DING DING! He tells me I’m a great lover, and he enjoys my enthusiasm as much as anything else- although he did mention my head game is phenomenal. We go another round and end up napping on each other for a bit.

A few days later he texts me out of the blue asking if I’d like to 3some with him sometime- clearly I’m going to jump at this opportunity. He needs me to find the other woman, that shouldn’t be too hard.  We chit-chat for a bit and I go about my merry business. I offer him a NSA BJ that night after I go to a comedy show, he’s very interested in that. I love giving him head, he’s so appreciative and vocal. Feedback is key! I’d had some bad luck in the past regarding giving head- mainly, I know I do it well and I enjoy getting my partner off… and some partners can be very selfish in this regard. I don’t have a G-spot in my mouth, so it’s not all about them- and if they DEMAND head for any reason they automatically will never get it from me. “I need it to get hard,” “I need it to finish,” “If you want good dick you gotta suck it.” Nope, fuck outta here with that noise. One of the things Mr. Articulate gasped out while I was going down on him was “you suck dick like you enjoy it.” I do. And I really like making you fucking squirm and moan and lose your mind.

After the show my lady date tells me she’s been having some not-so-great luck in her journey to meet new sexual partners. Mostly, they’re either assholes or they get too hung up on her- and who could blame them? She’s incredibly attractive, college educated, has a super cool job, and can talk you under the table about anything. You’d be lucky just to meet her in passing and get 5 minutes of her time. She asks me if I can recommend any of my previous partners, as I’ve already taken a test drive and can give an accurate review. She trusts my opinion on the D. Look, we all specialize in something- I just happen to be good at getting off. I know who’s just up her alley sexually (because he’s a giver,) physically, and intellectually. I text Mr. Articulate a pic of her and let him know she needs some quality lovin’ from someone not a douche bag. I give him the run down, he’s very excited. He’s coming to meet us right now. Hooray!

I’m not sticking around to watch them get all googly-eyed with each other. I know he’s hot, and she’s hot, and I can only assume the sex they’ll have will be amazing and fulfilling for everybody involved. I did stay until he showed up, to make her comfortable meeting him- remember, hoes before bros. They start talking and I see they’ve instantly hit it off. I can also tell he’s super into her- the pic I sent wasn’t the best, I know he’s blown away at how unique and gorgeous she is. Have fun, kids! I shouldn’t say kids, he’s older than us by a couple of years. Later she messages me that he was a pretty great lover. Score! He also texts me and tells me she’s an incredible lay and a total heartbreaker. Oh no, puppy dog- don’t fall in love! I mean, I’d actually really love it if they did have more than just a sexual relationship because I think they’d be a fairly evenly matched couple- but she’s not interested in that at the moment. Similar to my situation, she’s making up for lost time on unworthy monogamous relationships that fizzled out. He asks for advice on how to pursue her, and I give it to him straight to let her lead. If she’s interested it’ll happen. If not, enjoy what you get and be sure to give her your all because she fucking deserves it. He graciously accepts my sage like wisdom and I get to feel good about introducing them. I hope they have many, many wonderful nights together even if I don’t get to experience him again. It’s worth it in the end, I want everybody to be happy and have great sex.

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DD Fnord

I left my cheating spouse September of 2015. In October of that year, I filed for divorce and set out to move on and reclaim my lost libido. I spent 8 years of my 20's faithful to two unfaithful men, I have so much time to make up for! All The Dicks is my journey having sex with whoever I want, whenever I want, however I want. The first person I spent the night with after my husband, reignited the spark and desire I thought I would need counseling to retrieve. The second person I was with sealed the deal. I wasn't broken, I just needed a tune up. This collection of encounters are the ones worth re-telling- I don't write about every sexual encounter I have, and I certainly don't bother with any that were sub-par. The screenshots are my own personal wall of shame, but also my trophies because nobody puts baby in a corner.

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